Chinese Basketball Glossary

To those interested in the progress of roundball in the country that will probably be running the planet someday, the Confucius Institute at the University of Kansas is glad to bring us a glossary of Chinese basketball terms. (Their motto: "One billion Jayhawk fans can't be wrong.")

I got a kick out of it and began putting together my own writeups in Chinese:

"So I was sitting near the 边线 and I saw Betty Lennox 传球 to Erika de Souza who drove to the basket against Plenette Pierson but was called for 带球撞人 . Luckily the Shock were called for 带球走 and we got the ball right back.

I have to admit, Trader Bill's teams can really play 盯人. Alison Bales was able to 盖帽 every now and then, but Detroit was able 拿篮板 whenever they wanted. The Shock overwhelmed us. They must have scored 10 快攻 points, and everytime we tried a 快攻 it went 球出界 .

We were down 74-64 in the fourth quarter. Ivory Latta scored a couple of threes, Detroit misses the layup, and we have the ball back. And guess what? Katie Feenstra is called for a三秒违例 .

屎!!!"

Okay, that last symbol will only be found in a glossary of Chinese curse words. Which is appropriate for any writeup of a Dream game.